Okay listen up. Here’s the deal with mashed potatoes.

1. Get a bunch of yukon gold potatoes, from the Yukon

2. Boil them or steam them whole. It’s best to do them whole so that they don’t absorb much water. Steaming will result in the driest potatoes. They’re done when you can press a fork or knife into them with no resistence. But avoid poking them as much as possible.

3. When done, remove the potatoes from the water. Reserve a couple cups of potato water if you want to. Starchy potato water can be used in tons of stuff.

4. Put the empty pot back on the heat and melt some (vegan) butter. Or some kind of fat. Add a culp of milk. Or any kind of liquid: starchy potato water, wine, beer, vegetable stock, etc.

5. Peel the skins off or leave them on. I leave them on.

6. For creamy creamy potatoes, press them through a potato ricer. For chunky potatoes, mash them with a potato masher.

7. Add potatoes to the liquid, season with salt and pepper and garlic to taste.

8. Mix it all up good

9. Enjoy your mashed potatoes!