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tofu scramble

  • recipeOctober 5, 2020
  • it's not scrambled tofu

    Okay, story time.

    One time I went out to eat at a nice vegan restaurant for brunch, and I orderd a tofu scramble.

    When the food came out, I was given a plate of scrambled tofu. Much to my chagrin.

    I later mentioned it when my fellow diners asked me how my meal was. I said it was good, but I was disappointed because I ordered a tofu scramble, not scrambled tofu.

    Little did I know that this utterance would go down in history and live on in infamy for all time.

    Still even unto this very day, I will sometimes be laughed at for insisting there is a difference between the two.

    And still, even unto this very day, I insist that there is.

    And I think, gentle reader, if you engage the smallest number of brain cells for the briefest amount of time, you will agree.

    Imagine for a moment a plate of scrambled eggs.

    Got it? Good.

    Now imagine a breakfast scramble, sometimes called a breakfast skillet.

    These are radically different creatures!

    The former is merely a couple of eggs on a plate.

    The latter is a meal, complete with potatoes, onions and peppers, maybe some roasted tomatoes or salsa. It's a whole thing.

    So it is with scrambled tofu, a stand in for scrambled eggs, versus a tofu scramble, a complete hardy meal.

    Anyway, here's a recipe for a tofu scramble.

    1. Press and cube some tofu and roast it up real good.

    2. If you have a potato, cube and boil it, then roast it up real good too.

    3. Saute some red onion and bell pepper. Season them with salt, pepper, garlic.

    4. Wilt some spinach.

    5. Steam or roast some carrots. This step is important! I'm not that big a fan of raw carrots. I don't think they have much flavor or substance. But the cooked carrots here add good amount of flavor.

    6. Put it all together in a pan for a minute to let the flavors come together.